The start of 2017 hasn't been easy. With the new year and new semester at school has come with it an insanely busy schedule, lots of homework, too much snow, new friends, meeting some Rockies players, lots of laughter, good times, but also some trials, and quite a few sleepless nights. I'm amazed at how fast time goes by.
This shouldn't be any surprise to me since time always seemingly goes by so fast. When in the moment, it stands still at times.
I've been in the same routine for a while. I go to college at Utah State. I come home often. I had friends in Logan, friends here at home, and friends from other places as well. I like being social and doing things with my friends. Spending time with friends is one of my fave things. Just something about being around people who accept you & feeling like I belong. I find comfort in that. I think that's why I've struggled so much recently after various things have occurred. Loneliness has become a regular feeling for me as of late.
This has led me to evaluate many things in my life & to see what I really want to do & who/what I want in my life. After much thought, life is too short to keep people or things in my life that aren't helping me or who bring me down. This has been incredibly difficult to let people & things go that aren't helping me progress & help me be a better person. Copious amounts of prayers have been said and many hours pondering about what I should do. I'll continue to pray about it and what path I should take; it's a never ending process.
While I've been going through all of this, my family has never left my side. As well as very few select friends. How eternally grateful I have been & still are grateful for all of those people. Throughout this process, I've had to make some hard decisions & let go of people who have already fulfilled their role in my life.
With that begins a new chapter in my life. I didn't think this would happen, but I'm learning to be okay with less people in my life. Quality over quantity. This new chapter is very different, but I'm adapting to it & learning to enjoy life more fully. Even if I have to enjoy it on my own.
The lesson behind all of this is to not fear change. I might be somewhat terrified of this new chapter, but at the same time I'm embracing it. I may not know what I'm doing exactly. But it's quite alright because my loving Heavenly Father has a perfect plan for it. He's in control & knows I need this in my life.
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