You beat cancer by how you live, why you live and in the manner in which you live.
I had never thought that someone so close to me would get diagnosed with cancer. This was silly to think that it wouldn’t happen to me, but that foolish thought was ruined about 2.5 years ago. My grandpa Charlie was diagnosed with cancer around the end of July 2017. I remember those few days so vividly still. My dad had told us that grandpa went to the medical clinic that day and was there all day long getting tests done to try to figure out what was wrong. After spending nearly all day in the clinic and in testing, he was admitted to the hospital. We still didn’t know what was wrong, just that there were some concerning things. The thought that it could be cancer passed through my mind, but I quickly pushed that thought out of my head because I didn’t want it to be true.
The next day we heard that it was cancer. My grandpa had been sick off and on for awhile and had lost a lot of weight, but at least now we knew why. It was difficult to hear the “c-word” but also comforting to know what was wrong. That day and the day after, I remember spending the majority of the time with my family and ignoring my work responsibilities. But at that time, family was the most important thing.
We were told that with treatment he would have a minimum of 3 to 5 years left if the cancer hadn’t metastasized and moved to other parts of his body. Again that idea was shattered after hearing he had cancer in many places in his body: his pelvis, clavicle, spine, and more. As a result of this, we had no idea how much longer we had with him. It literally felt like it was a ticking clock that we had no idea when it was going to go off.
My family took a road trip to Denver for a Colorado Rockies game with grandpa in tow just a few weeks after his diagnosis. We didn’t know how much longer we had with him and were taking every chance we could to make memories. One of the games was especially meaningful for our family as one of their players was making his debut for that year after having beat cancer. We didn’t know ahead of time that Chad Bettis would be pitching that game, but it sure was a tender mercy for our family. Christmas later that year one my brothers got all of us a Chad Bettis baseball card to remember the game by.
Since we now had a tentative expiration on our time with grandpa, we packed in as many memories as we could. We went to Denver to Rockies baseball games, went to USU basketball games every year, visited as much as we could and everything else in between. I feel very lucky and grateful for the time I was able to spend with my grandpa, particularly in the last few years. He came with us on a trip to Oregon, to the demolition derby at the fair, to Shoshone Falls when we visited him and my grandma in Jerome. I was very close with him and always loved talking with him and seeing him.
Every time he saw me, he would say “Hello sunshine!” It made me smile each time he called me sunshine. When he would call me sunshine it made me smile even bigger than I already was. He always had a smile on his face and could easily make you laugh (especially if his favorite song “Itsy Bitsy Yellow Polka Dot Bikini” got brought up). From that silly song he taught me to not take things too seriously.
That was just one of the many things he taught me. I learned so much from my grandpa, especially growing up just down the road from him, working alongside him on the farm, and spending as much time with him as I did since his diagnosis. He taught me to work hard and be willing to help with anything. To go out of my way to help those around me. To slow down and take everything in occasionally. To be patient for things to happen in your life. To have fun in every situation. To look for the positive in every day. He would say, “Every day is a good day, some are just better than others.”
Since his passing, I’ve seen small hints that he is still with us and with me. These small moments or memories bring a glimpse of happiness to me. One Sunday in church the man leading the music was wearing a Jerry Garcia tie. He had many ties that brand and each of his sons and grandsons had one of those ties for his funeral. (My dad even asked me if I had a Jerry Garcia tie to wear to the funeral to which I said, “No I won’t be wearing a tie to the funeral.”) Recently, I went to visit my aunt, uncle, cousins and grandma. While I was helping my grandma with a few things. There was part of a case of Coke up in the upstairs storage room and a couple of his jackets in the closet. He loved Coke and drank a few a day. He also wore fleece plaid jackets all the time.
In the few months since he’s been gone, I’ve often thought about him. Some days are difficult and I miss him terribly. But I know he will always be watching over me and there for me, just not like he used to. I’m not a Yankees or Mariners fan, but I might follow those teams a bit more now just for Charlie.
Charlie got called up to the majors in October, but will always be my all star & I’ll always be his sunshine. Run fast & slide in grandpa, you're finally home. I’ll see you again some day. I'll think about you and miss you every day until then.
